Faith, family & the right to be heard
When Loyalty Meets Accountability
An email exchange with a longtime member of Living Word Church.
In July 2024, I asked a longtime church member to help bring my concerns to the church board. Our emails moved from that request into a wider disagreement about loyalty, evidence, responsibility, and what it means to respond to people who say they have been harmed.
Daniel Robert Mazur · Emails of July 11–16, 2024
A request for oversight. A wider disagreement.
After meeting Christian at a family wedding in Syracuse, I asked him to forward my concerns about Pastor Bryan Rocine to the church board, or help me contact its members. Christian’s replies questioned my account of the church’s history, defended aspects of its leadership, and urged a different way of understanding the past.
For me, the exchange raised questions about how people can seek accountability within a community to which others remain deeply loyal. For Christian, it raised concerns about fairness, personal responsibility, faith, and the purpose of revisiting old conflicts. The emails below preserve both voices.
“Christian” is a pseudonym, not his real name. I have withheld his real name to avoid embarrassing him.
The message headings and short descriptions are reading aids. The emails retain their original wording, with paragraph breaks and line wrapping adapted for the web. Dates and times follow the source record; its concealed name and redactions remain in place.
The complete exchange · 12 emails
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Read in sequence, open a particular message, or search for a subject or phrase. Each email identifies its sender and preserves its original headers.
12 emails · July 11–16, 2024
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01Daniel MazurA request to contact the church boardI ask for the concerns shared with Pastor Bryan Rocine to reach the board.Thursday, July 11, 2024 8:43 AM
From: Daniel Mazur <dan@compits.net>
Sent: Thursday, July 11, 2024 8:43 AM
To: Christian
Subject: Seeking Change
Hi Christian,
It was wonderful meeting you again, both at my niece’s wedding and later at the church on Sunday morning. Our conversations were a refreshing reminder of the positive memories I have with some people from my past.
Over the past few weeks, I have been in communication with your pastor, Bryan Rocine. He mentioned that his actions as pastor are overseen by board members who hold the authority to intervene if his conduct strays from what is considered acceptable within your church. As I trust you are already aware, this oversight is crucial for maintaining the integrity and compassion that should define the core nature of the church's leadership.
I approached Bryan with deep concerns about the way he has treated me and the wrongful treatment many others have experienced at the hands of his predecessor, who was my father, as well as others. This was spurred by his gesture during a sermon, where he offered his cell phone number, seemingly inviting those he has wronged to seek an apology. However, my interactions with him have left me disheartened. His responses have been insincere, revealing a troubling lack of concern or care for the issues I’ve raised. He has not only refused to address these concerns but has also failed to acknowledge them.
In the spirit of seeking resolution and fostering a more compassionate community, I am sharing a link to the thread of our text messages. My hope is that you can present this to the board members or, alternatively, provide me with their names and contact information if you have it.
Thank you for your understanding and assistance in this matter. Together, we can work towards a more just and caring environment for everyone.
Warm regards,
Link: Seeking Change
02ChristianChristian’s first replyChristian reflects on the church’s history, my father’s leadership, and faith.Thursday, July 11, 2024 10:48 AM
From: Christian
Sent: Thursday, July 11, 2024 10:48 AM
To: Daniel Mazur <dan@compits.net>
Subject: RE: Seeking Change
Hi Dan,
I was very glad that you made it to the wedding and I’m sure that Paul, your Mom, and others in the family were also. We really enjoyed seeing Mary Jane again, it’s been a long time.
I have read thru the thread you sent and being totally honest, it’s a lot to think about, having just come into the office a while ago with a ton of work to do.
As a business owner yourself, I’m sure you understand that. All I can say at the moment is I will take another look at it some evening soon at home with less distractions.
I’m a lot older now and more cautious than when I was a young man. The old proverb, “Measure Twice, Cut Once” is something I’ve become very fond of. I do realize there’s a lot of things to unpack that have happened over the years at the Church. Regardless of his flaws, which all leaders have them, one of the things that makes it very easy for me to believe your Dad received a call from the Lord is the simple fact that no one is going to leave behind a successful business to work with a bunch of young hippies that have nothing to offer. There really was no upside for him getting involved with us all. As a mature man now yourself, I’m thinking you can understand just how rough his background was. I do think with the sensibilities of our society today he would likely be considered to have been an abused child. Back in those days, you were pretty much expected to suck it up no matter what life threw at you. There didn’t seem to be too much compassion and understanding floating around. Relevance of all this, I think the obsession he developed for control was basically a protection mechanism. Protection meant, nobody is going to hurt me.
We were all well aware of this need for high levels of control fairly early on. I think that those of us who thought the Lord was behind the Church accepted it, even though there was a lot about it we didn’t like.
If you know anything about the Civil War, you know that President Lincoln had several Generals that were in charge of the Union troops that just couldn’t get much done. Finally, he found General Grant and after much blood, sweat, and tears, ended up winning the war. Your Dad was a General Grant kind of guy. It wasn’t pretty, but he got things done.
The last thing I’ll say for this morning (as the business is pressing heavy on me), I never did really understand why he asked Pop and Gert to leave. I can’t say I agree or disagree, because I don’t have the facts. I can say that us young guys loved Pop, and we thought he was the greatest. I’ve mentioned this to your Mom several times. In all of your communications, I can see that this is one of the biggest things troubling you.
Regardless of the mistakes and shortcomings of your Father, there comes a point where you have to let it go and focus on Jesus. Things that have happened in your family have caused you a lot of pain and trouble. As you say, you have also made mistakes and have tried to face up to them. Going over the past can be valuable and helpful, but only to a point. After a while you hit diminishing returns. There’s really not much new understanding to be gained by keeping rehashing the same things.
I would recommend getting out your Bible and start fresh with Jesus and what He has done for each of us on the cross. See what He has to say about things. You probably think you already know, but you may be surprised. When we seek God, we always find Truth, because that is what He has promised us. Jesus can give you a fresh start, new faith, and healing from the disappointments of the past.
Kind Regards,
Christian
03Daniel MazurReturning to the original requestI clarify that the immediate request concerns oversight of the pastor.Thursday, July 11, 2024 11:48 AM
From: Daniel Mazur
Sent: Thursday, July 11, 2024 11:48 AM
To: Christian
Subject: RE: Seeking Change
Hi Christian,
Thank you for your thoughtful message. There are many aspects within it that I'd be delighted to discuss further with you, though much of it isn't directly related to my initial reason for reaching out. Nonetheless, I'm more than willing to have a conversation at your convenience. If you ever decide to read my book, you'll find that many of the questions you raised are already addressed within its pages.
In the meantime, could I kindly ask you to assist with my original request? Would you be able to forward the text thread to the board members or provide me with their names if you have them? It's important to me that they are aware of the interactions between myself and the Church pastor. My goal is to ascertain whether Bryan's response was deemed appropriate or if further action is warranted.
Thank you very much for your understanding and assistance.
04Daniel MazurQuestions about evidence and responsibilityI question assumptions about my motives and ask what accountability requires.Friday, July 12, 2024 10:03 AM
From: Daniel Mazur
Sent: Friday, July 12, 2024 10:03 AM
To: Christian
Subject: RE: Seeking Change
Hello again, Christian,
In our previous exchange, I mentioned my intent to have my text thread delivered to the Church’s board members. While I hadn’t anticipated your comments and questions, I welcome the opportunity to discuss them and any other concerns you may have.
This morning, I found myself deeply reflecting on some claims you’ve made about me, and I am curious to know how you arrived at your conclusions. Who informed you that I’ve had previous discussions with anyone causing harm to me or others? I have attempted such discussions, but neither Bryan nor my father was willing to engage with me. My father passed away, holding out until his dying day. As for Bryan, I urge you to read the thread again—do you see him addressing any of the important concerns I’ve brought to his attention? Do you think any of my past dialogues with him have been any different? How, then, have I been rehashing the same issues when they have yet to be properly discussed and addressed? Regardless of "flaws," which you say all leaders have, why have you reduced decades of atrocious behavior to mere flaws?
Furthermore, where did you learn that my actions are not based on “getting out the Bible” and “seeing what Jesus has to say?” In reality, my actions stem from years of scriptural review. Anyone with a basic understanding of the scriptures can see that my actions are biblically based, as evidenced by the thread I provided. Do I need to quote the scriptures for you?
These are my primary reflections and concerns regarding your comments. While I appreciate that your comments show no ill intent, I am alarmed by the damage caused when people claim to understand the minds and actions of others without proper investigation or learning from those being spoken about. Sometimes, it’s as simple as asking the question, “Why are you doing this?” instead of claiming to know the answer. Isn’t it evident this is what concerns me about Bryan when he labeled me a rebellious son, a God-hater, saying God is my arch enemy and making other disparaging remarks defaming my character?
Additionally, you mentioned that there was no upside for my father leaving his business for hippies and other unwanted types, suggesting that you believe he was called by the Lord. I wonder why you said this and what relevance it has to my concerns. If it is relevant, is it not possible that he, as a man, may have lost his way, even if he believed he was called by God? And if he wasn’t called by the Lord, could there not be other reasons for his actions? Have there not been men from various contradicting religions who falsely believed they were called? Could he not have simply been mistaken or driven by a thirst for power and control? Perhaps he was frustrated with his business partners, seeking more control, or simply could not get along with them. Maybe he did something very wrong, or they did something very wrong, leading to his departure. What do you truly know about his partners, his business, and his situation beyond what you’ve been told? Have you ever looked into the matter deeply?
And what do you truly know about me other than what you’ve been told? Can you recognize that you may have already made a similar mistake with me?
Christian, you’ve failed to look under the hood and see the reality beyond the surface.
Throughout my life, I’ve heard countless excuses made for my father’s and Bryan’s wrongful behavior, and your message to me is filled with them, even extending to a story about President Lincoln and General Grant. Where is the accountability? Why have you and others consistently avoided this crucial, Bible-based aspect in every discussion with me? Can’t you offer as many, if not more, comments asserting the need for accountability? Have you considered the damaging consequences if these issues remain unaddressed? You’ve not mentioned even one.
Regarding abuse, being abused as a child is no excuse for perpetuating harm. For my part, I wouldn’t change anything about my past, as it has given me abilities I would not otherwise have. I am grateful for the benefits of my experience. Have you ever heard such a perspective? If so, why has no one from your background ever shared it with me? Shouldn't the focus be on learning from our past to teach others and pass along a good and worthy message? Don’t we all have a troubled past of one sort or another?
Christian, as kind as you are, I implore you to open your eyes to the profound damage caused by ungodly behavior within your church. Stop making excuses for these wrongdoings and summon the courage to confront and rectify them. Only by facing these wrongs with courage can we hope to correct them and foster true healing and reconciliation. I hope you are not clinging to these excuses, for addressing these matters may require a reassessment of the past and recognition of opportunities once available to you that have simply been dismissed. Despite your good intentions, you and others may have fallen short of what is scripturally required to help the loved ones you care for. Let us urge each other to obey the scriptures and strive to fulfill our obligations to bring about the change that is desperately needed.
05Daniel MazurA follow-up on accountability and careThe discussion turns to former members, family relationships, and practical compassion.Saturday, July 13, 2024 12:58 PM
From: Daniel Mazur <dan@compits.net>
Sent: Saturday, July 13, 2024 12:58 PM
To: Christian
Subject: RE: Seeking Change
Hello again, Christian.
I write to you once more, seeking a response to my previous message. How many more days must pass before I receive an answer to my question? Will you forward my message to the board, or can you provide me with their names? Why do even the simplest requests from longstanding members of your Church encounter such resistance and delay? Is this something that necessitates prayer before action? It certainly cannot be a matter of needing more time, as you were swift to counsel me on matters I had neither intended nor asked to discuss. Since you opened that door, let us begin this dialogue in earnest.
For decades, countless individuals have endured terrible treatment and harm within the Church. It is inconceivable that you are unaware of the pervasive lies and deceit, to which you have chosen to remain uninvolved. Lou Levante, a former longtime member and Academy principal, once apologized to me after he, too, became a victim of such deceit. My sisters, Debbie and Pam, reached out years ago, seeking forgiveness after they and their children suffered the same malicious tactics within the Church and Academy. David Gentile sought my counsel when he faced threats of disconnection from his own family unless he complied with the Church's demands.
This pattern of behavior is not isolated but pervasive, impacting countless individuals who have dedicated themselves to your Church. The reluctance to address these issues and provide transparency only serves to perpetuate harm and erode trust within the community. I implore you to reflect on the consequences of your actions—or inactions—and to take a decisive stand for truth and justice, as these principles should be the cornerstone of your faith and the leadership of the Church.
Former elders and board members like Jerry Brown, Timmy Ragonese, and Don Cerio were subjected to false accusations and rumors that led to their unjust removal from positions of authority. Have you read any of the letters on my website regarding families who moved out of state, only to have their children wrongfully treated by the Academy after their departure? Have you read any of the heartfelt letters from these children to their former teachers at the Academy? They are heartbreaking. What will it take for you to acknowledge the truth that you have already seen and know? Will it take a personal tragedy, as it has for so many others? Do you not feel the pain, as I have, when those you care about are harmed?
Let’s assume, for argument's sake, that all these situations are the fault of those harmed and that the Church and Academy heads bear no responsibility. Even if the many complaints have resulted in self-inflicted harm, should the Church not make itself available to anyone with a grievance, justified or not? This highlights how far out of hand things have become within your organization. Common sense has become a rarity, and I should not be surprised.
It seems impossible to be a long-time member of the Church, to stand for others, and to prioritize justice over self-interest, for such nobility appears nonexistent in the leadership of your Church. Why then should its congregation, people like you, be expected to embody such qualities? To behave nobly and honorably, to follow the messages within scripture, is to be punished, lied about, and cast out of the organization, with remaining members warned and threatened not to involve themselves with such people. Were you to possess such qualities, you would have been removed from the organization long ago.
You claimed to love “Pop,” my Grandfather, and others who left or were forced out of the Church. But what does this love truly entail? Did you ever reach out to him to say hello or check on his well-being? He was abandoned by his own daughter, my mother, decades ago, and by my father and all four of my siblings. My mother now grieves deeply for the mistakes she made, not only with him but also with her mother, with me, and with her only sister. She cried about these regrets every day during my visit for my niece’s wedding.
Where was your support, your wisdom, your love for these kind, loving people? Did you ever offer a hand of friendship or a word of comfort during their times of need? Likely not, because they were no longer in your Church. This selective love reveals a troubling truth about your actions and the Church's stance.
Love, in its truest form, transcends boundaries and remains steadfast regardless of circumstances. It is not contingent upon one's affiliation with an institution. True love is reaching out to those in pain, offering solace and understanding, regardless of whether they remain within the fold. It is standing by them in their darkest hours, providing a shoulder to cry on, and a comforting presence when they feel most alone.
Love is not passive. It does not wait for convenience or seek validation through institutional approval. It acts with courage and compassion, driven by a genuine desire to connect and heal. True love understands that every human being, regardless of their choices or affiliations, deserves dignity, respect, and care.
So, I ask again: Where was your love for my Grandfather and others who were forced out or left the Church? Where was your compassion when they needed it most? Your silence and inaction speak volumes, revealing a love that is conditional and selective. This is not the love that Christ taught us to embody. True Christian love requires us to break down walls, to extend our hands across divides, and to care for one another without judgment or reservation.
Reflect on this, Christian. Consider the profound difference between love that is professed and love that is practiced. True leadership, true faith, and true love are not measured by adherence to an institution but by the courage to act justly, the compassion to care deeply, and the wisdom to listen earnestly to all voices. These are the qualities that define true nobility and Christian behavior.
Yet, you claim to be neutral and non-judgmental because you do not know all the facts. This assertion of impartiality rings hollow when, in reality, your actions—or lack thereof—have demonstrated otherwise. You have taken steps and chosen sides, aligning yourself with the very institution that has perpetuated harm. Is this truly noble or Christian behavior? True Christian love and nobility require us to stand up for what is right, to offer support to those who have been wronged, and to seek justice for the oppressed.
Your silence and inaction speak volumes. They reveal a complicity that undermines the very principles of love and compassion that you profess to uphold. Love is not passive; it is active and courageous. It compels us to reach out, to heal, and to stand in solidarity with those who suffer. Reflect on the essence of love and the responsibilities it entails. True love demands more than words; it requires action, empathy, and unwavering support for those in need.
You mentioned General Grant; I choose to leave you with the wisdom of the former Roman Emperor and Stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius, who wrote in The Meditations: "If any man is able to convince me and show me that I do not think or act right, I will gladly change; for I seek the truth by which no man was ever injured. But he is injured who abides in his error and ignorance." Aurelius's words remind us that everyone should be listened to—Christians, heathens, the wise, and even the foolish. This is the same message I tried to convey to Byan Rocine at my father’s funeral, inspired by the wisdom my father shared with me in our final conversation before he passed away. “We all have something to offer each other,” he told me, even when I defiantly declared my atheism to challenge his belief in my wisdom.
Reflect on this, Christian. True leadership, true faith, and true love are not measured by adherence to an institution but by the courage to act justly, the compassion to care deeply, and the wisdom to listen earnestly to all voices. These are the qualities that define true nobility and Christian behavior.
06ChristianChristian declines the board requestChristian states that he will not provide board-member information or become involved.Sunday, July 14, 2024 9:30 AM
From: Christian
Sent: Sunday, July 14, 2024 9:30 AM
Subject: Re: Seeking Change
Hi Danny,
I have moved your message to my personal email account for starters. Due to my business as a XXXXX, my business email is monitored 24/7, as all communications are available to the SEC and FINRA. These are the agencies that regulate XXXXX.
The short answer to the question of providing information on Church board members is I have no intention of doing that. This ongoing battle you have going with Brother Bryan, the Church, and whoever else, is not something I have any desire to stick my nose into.
While I find many of your questions interesting and would be inclined to answer some of them when I can make some time, the fact that you are attacking me in both of these long emails is a turn off. I've been at the Church since White's Chapel and am well aware of many of the things that have gone on. Nobody ever has the whole story, and you are also only telling one side. We will all have to answer to Jesus some day for the things we've done, and that certainly includes your Father. If I have made a decision to stick with the Church, which I have, that's my decision to make. I don't believe it's my life's work to try and rectify wrongs and conflicts that have happened over many decades and I did not have a hand in. If I have wronged someone, then obviously I have an obligation to try sincerely to make that right. That's all I have to say for now.
Christian
07Daniel MazurAccounts of harm and the need to listenI share excerpts from former members and discuss support, counseling, and reconciliation.Sunday, July 14, 2024 9:32 AM
From: Daniel Mazur
Sent: Sunday, July 14, 2024 9:32 AM
To: Christian
Subject: RE: Seeking Change
Good morning, Christian.
It's Sunday, 6:12 AM, and I imagine you'll be heading to church soon. Before you go, or when you return and have a moment to read this message, I want to bring some important matters to your attention—matters that today’s service might overlook.
These are not just any matters; they are the lived experiences of people you know, individuals whose situations you've remained uninvolved with and whose issues have never been addressed. These are stories of pain, trauma, and neglect that have been ignored for far too long.
You may be unaware of these facts, so I have taken the liberty to compile a few key points. These are voices crying out for recognition, for empathy, and for justice. Here are just a few of their stories:
Ruth Smith, thirteen years old, wrote: “When I left Living Word I was mad because they wouldn’t let me go in and say goodbye to my friends… It also made me mad because we couldn’t talk to people out of our faith. But now that I’m going to public schools I’ve got more friends and I’m a lot happier now that I’m out of there, and so are my two other friends that left.”
Jude & Irene’s daughter Kimberly: “My best friend, Jason Becker, was leaving Living Word. I didn’t know what to do. I had grown up with him my whole life. ‘What was I going to do now,’ I thought. I was taught that if someone had left the church or school, they were no longer Christians and would eventually go to hell. My school told me this. If he had backslidden, I wasn’t allowed to talk to him anymore. I was told he would tell me lies, and I would want to leave too. I was being brainwashed since kindergarten.”
Susan Bartels: “When my mother left when I was 7 years old, Brother Bob Mazur preached consistently that God doesn’t want unequally yoked relationships, even families. My parents never spoke or allowed us kids contact with my mom. Mr. Mazur would often comment that he doesn’t speak with his son or parents for that reason… After being scolded by Brother Bob Mazur and Brian Rocine for driving a college classmate to school regularly who didn’t attend our church, I decided that this was ridiculous and I left the church.”
Micah, a 1st Grader’s handwritten letter: “I love first grade. Dear Sister Linda, and the class. Sorry I was kicked out of school. It was fun in your class… I love first grade. It is fantastic, and it is so fun. You guys are the best class in the whole wide world.”
James Farmer: “The school does not allow extra-curricular activities with outside institutions. The academy discourages its students from seeking higher education at colleges outside of the Syracuse area, thus further limiting their opportunities.”
Patricia Corbett: “I am a former teacher’s assistant at the Church of the Living Word. I taught there for approximately six years… This school does not permit extra-curricular activities whatsoever, such as karate, little league, pop warner football, etc., outside of church members. This was very hard on my son. I found the school’s attitude and policies very narrow-minded about people that were non-church members. We were consistently told we could not make it in the outside world… My son and I were shunned by their membership after we left.”
Patricia Smith: “GM made the announcement that the plant was closing… we began praying about our options. When my husband and I decided to transfer to Lansing, Michigan, we began telling our friends at the church. To our shock and dismay, we began to experience total rejection from our friends… The pastor preached off the pulpit about people taking transfers and moving out of state and not trusting God to take care of them in this community… My husband called from work the next day and talked to the principal. He asked my husband if he was attending another church. My husband said that we were and were happy there. He proceeded to tell my husband that we should take our children out of the academy… The same day, he went from work to the school to pick up the children’s belongings from their desks. This was in the middle of May when they only had six weeks left of school… My children were very hurt by this because they couldn’t say goodbye to any of their friends that they had grown up with since birth.”
Laura Hazen: “Having been an active member of this church from 1981 to 1986… the belief that their organization has more spiritual truth than other local churches and that a member who leaves this church is most certainly out of the will of God. At all costs, members are encouraged by use of fear tactics, manipulation of scripture, and peer pressure to attend this Living Word church… The result of not attending would result in possible loss of salvation, spiritual death… Members are not encouraged to ask questions of the leadership, and private counseling from the pastor and elders is virtually non-existent.”
Pastor Lee Simmons: “I met with the Sleights at their home to see if I could give any counsel for their marriage problem… Steven admitted that in the past he had physically abused his wife on several occasions… I encouraged Steve to commit himself to counseling and begin attending church together with his wife and children. I suggested he leave his church because it seemed that going to his church was more important than marital reconciliation. He chose to put his church above his wife, which has led to the present state of non-reconciliation.”
Cathy Zella: “I attended the Living Word Church for 16 years. Each year it got worse. (A total control type church)… My husband was diagnosed 12 years ago as a manic depressive. He had a severe chemical imbalance which caused sudden mood swings… The church held a meeting where they encircled him and prayed over him as to cast out this evil spirit… We were reluctant to seek medical help because of the faith doctrine the church taught at that point… He went into a severe depression. He realized that he needed to go back on the medication again but was very upset by this because, once again, he felt he would not be using faith in God, influenced by what he had been taught… My husband committed suicide. He went into such a severe depression, and if he had not delayed in getting help from the influence of that church, he might still be alive today. He was also afraid to go back on the medicine because he would have to follow up with counseling, and Living Word taught against seeking counseling outside of their church… They preached on not going to other churches and getting involved in other organizations… Yet if you tried to leave, they would tell you that you were leaving the will of God and God’s hand of protection would be off from you. They used fear tactics to keep you there.”
Christian,
These are just excerpts from some of the letters I have. I could continue with more, but this should be enough to make the message clear. What will you say now? That this was long ago and everything has changed? You haven't read my book yet, but what about the one by Mary Sorrendino, a former member of 16 years, titled "Misery to Ministry"? I referenced this book to Bryan in my text messages. Mary’s sister Toni had a stillbirth and sought counsel from her pastor, my father, but was told there would be no visit, no support. Due to the church's teachings that secular counsel was forbidden, Toni suffered further and unnecessarily when support was available all along.
These are not isolated incidents; they are part of a disturbing pattern. The pain and trauma inflicted on individuals seeking solace and support from the church are real and have lasting consequences. It's time to stop ignoring these voices and start addressing the deep-seated issues within the church. Will you finally acknowledge the harm that has been done and take meaningful steps towards change?
When I met with Mary in Syracuse just a few weeks ago, I realized that my mother finally came to understand what you still refuse to see—the wrongs committed in so many instances in the past. This meeting with Mary wasn't just a casual visit; it was a profound moment of reckoning and realization. I saw a genuine opportunity for healing, a chance for Mary and my mother to reunite and find solace in each other's company over a simple cup of coffee. I suggested this reconciliation to Bryan, hoping he would see the value in such a meeting, but he refused to take part.
What I had not mentioned to Bryan in my texts was the tragic loss that Toni, Mary’s sister, endured when her young son was struck and killed by a drunk driver. The aftermath of this tragedy was further compounded by the church’s response. Instead of offering compassion and support, the incident was coldly spoken of from the pulpit, suggesting that had he been in church, he would still be alive today. This heartless assertion wasn't just insensitive; it was a blatant use of fear tactics to manipulate and control.
This is the same message I heard years ago, the same fear tactics that Cathy Zella spoke about: “If you tried to leave, they would tell you that you were leaving the will of God, and God’s hand of protection would be off from you.” The church's approach has consistently been to instill fear, to suggest that any deviation from their teachings would lead to disaster and divine abandonment. This toxic environment has caused immeasurable harm to countless individuals and families.
When I think back on my suggestion for my mother and Mary to meet, I see it as a microcosm of what needs to happen on a larger scale. There needs to be a widespread acknowledgment of the wrongs done, an acceptance of the pain inflicted, and a genuine effort towards healing. This is not just about reconnecting over coffee; it’s about breaking the cycle of fear and control, about offering true compassion and support where it has long been withheld.
Christian, it’s time to face these uncomfortable truths. It's time to listen to the voices of those who have been hurt and to take meaningful steps to ensure that such harm does not continue. Will you have the courage to confront these issues head-on, or will you continue to turn a blind eye? The choice is yours, but the need for change is undeniable.
Why has none of this ever been addressed? All these accounts from past members about outside help and counseling being forbidden—don’t you remember Art Zella hanging himself in the basement of his Liverpool home? This tragedy was a direct result of the church's failure to provide the necessary support and to allow access to mental health resources. If the church had acknowledged the importance of mental health and offered proper counseling, Art might still be alive today.
Facing that tragedy and realizing the importance of addressing mental health could have allowed Mary’s sister Toni to be comforted during her stillbirth and when she lost her son. Instead, she endured further trauma, compounded by the church's harmful teachings and lack of support. Imagine if, from the very beginning, the church had addressed these wrongs. If the pastor and elders had been accessible and supportive, offering real compassion and guidance, Toni’s suffering could have been alleviated.
As Laura Hazen said, “Members are not encouraged to ask questions of the leadership, and private counseling from the pastor and elders is virtually non-existent.” This systemic failure to provide adequate support and to discourage questioning has created an environment where pain and suffering are ignored, and fear and control dominate.
It’s not enough to say that things have changed. Words without actions are meaningless. Look at Bryan, who labors so hard to avoid discussing these issues with me and addressing my concerns. Look at you, offering excuses for the wrongful behavior and delaying my simple request to bring my concerns to the attention of those your pastor is supposed to be accountable to. Instead of encouraging me to continue in the pursuit of justice, you offer counsel as if you know who I am and what I have and have not done in making my determinations to move forward on the course of action I’ve taken. “I’m a lot older now and more cautious,” you say. You “Measure twice, cut once.”
So, when you write me again, what will you say? Will you list more generals of warfare, names of those in battle who seem to align with your message of the ends justifying the means? Or will you finally acknowledge the pain, the unaddressed suffering, and the desperate need for change?
The time for denial and avoidance is over. The community is crying out for accountability, for empathy, for real transformation that addresses the deep wounds inflicted by years of neglect and harmful teachings. Healing begins with recognition and action. Will you be part of that change, or will you continue to turn a blind eye? The choice is yours, but know that the call for justice will not be silenced. The path to healing is clear, but it requires courage, honesty, and a commitment to truly making things right. Will you step up and be a force for good, or will you let this opportunity for change slip away? The decision rests with you, but remember, the need for change is undeniable, and the time for action is now.
It’s time to reflect on the past and ensure that such neglect and harm do not continue. Healing begins with recognition and action. The community is crying out for accountability, for empathy, for real transformation that addresses the deep wounds inflicted by years of neglect and harmful teachings. People are demanding transparency and accountability. They want leaders who will stand up for what is right, who will listen and respond to the voices of those who have been hurt.
This is a pivotal moment. Will you rise to the occasion, or will you fall back on old patterns of denial and avoidance? The need for change is undeniable, and the opportunity for real healing and transformation is within reach.
The path forward requires courage, honesty, and a willingness to confront uncomfortable truths. It demands that we hold ourselves and our leaders accountable, that we reject the fear tactics and control mechanisms that have caused so much pain. It requires us to embrace empathy, compassion, and genuine support for those in need.
So, when you write me again, consider carefully what you will say. Will you continue to defend the indefensible, or will you take a stand for justice and healing? The choice is yours, but the eyes of the community are upon you, and the call for change will not be silenced.
08Daniel MazurThe limits of the exchangeI acknowledge the refusal and explain why the leadership analogy troubles me.Sunday, July 14, 2024 8:05 PM
From: Daniel Mazur
Sent: Sunday, July 14, 2024 8:05 PM
To: Christian
Subject: RE: Seeking Change
One more thing, Christian, and then I will leave you alone, as it seems that’s what you prefer, given your silence until now.
I finally have the answer to the only thing I initially asked of you: either to provide me with the names of the board members who oversee Pastor Bryan or to forward my concerns to them. You have made it clear that you will not grant my request. Your unwillingness to support transparency and adhere to the scriptural requirements for such matters speaks volumes and reveals a lack of understanding of these requirements. With this clarity, I now have what I came for, and I can move on.
As for the rest that has transpired, if you did not want me to reflect on the many statements and claims you made, you could have refrained from presenting them unsolicited.
You mentioned Ulysses S. Grant, and I am curious about the origin of that reference. Did it come from the pulpit of your church, from an elder or pastor you respect, or from your own imagination? Regardless of its source, Christian, it is profoundly misguided. These questions are not meant for you to answer but rather for you to contemplate.
Grant’s battles were fought on fields of war, against clear and tangible enemies. What I’ve been talking to you about is not a battle against an enemy, but a plea for the love, care, and concern that is missing from those who are supposed to be our comrades, our own troops. The individuals we speak of are not enemies to be vanquished, but brothers and sisters who have been wronged, harmed, lied to, and banished unjustly. They are good and loving people, deserving of support and compassion, not condemnation.
Your justification of the church leadership’s actions as ‘necessary’ reveals a troubling disconnect from the principles of love and justice that should be at the heart of your faith. It is not necessary to ostracize and harm those who seek truth and healing. It is not righteous to defend actions that cause pain and division among us.
Christian, you have strayed far from the path of empathy and understanding. Despite my attempts to show you this, it seems my words have not touched your heart. All I can do now is express my deep sorrow for the widening chasm between us, a chasm born of your unwavering defense of the indefensible.
Since you have chosen not to respond favorably to my request, I will respect your apparent desire for distance and leave you alone, just as I have with Bryan. I regret that our correspondence went through your business account, but that was your decision and I had no knowledge or control over it. For myself, all my messages are through my business, as I view them as one and the same.
It grieves me to end our conversation, but I must honor your wishes. May you one day find your way back to the love and compassion that should guide us all.
09Daniel MazurThe purpose of the book and websiteI explain my hopes for the memoir and ask about concealing Christian’s name.Monday, July 15, 2024 7:30 AM
From: Daniel Mazur
Sent: Monday, July 15, 2024 7:30 AM
To: Christian
Subject: RE: Seeking Change
Christian,
On another topic, I want to clarify the purpose of my book and its associated website, as my intentions have been largely misunderstood. As you know, I do not have a relationship with many of my nephews, nieces, a brother, and a sister, and only recently, after decades of separation, have I reconnected with my mother. These separations were not caused by any direct interactions between me and these family members. Instead, they stem from deliberate mischaracterizations perpetuated by your church, adherence to unhealthy dogmas that were never revised, and a lack of compassion and understanding fostered within our family and religious environment.
My goal in revealing these harmful characteristics is to help loved ones recognize the wrongs of the past, realize their impact, and inspire change. I hope for a future where a nephew realizes that an intimate relationship with me, despite differing religious beliefs, is not only possible but also healthy and beneficial for all involved. Additionally, my book and website aim to forewarn those considering involvement in such organizations, making them aware of the potential consequences they may face. It is deeply important to me to stand as a voice, even if one of the few, representing the many good people who have been harmed.
Christian, my correspondence with you highlights a concerning pattern I have noticed among long-standing members of the Living Word Church. It will be very informative to share this dialogue on my website. However, I see no advantage to my goal in citing your name. My intent is to convey that my communication has been with a long-standing member of the church, one who has communicated with me in ways similar to many other long-standing members I have known. Given your reservations about transparency, I am asking if you would like me to conceal your name from the text. I could do so without asking, but perhaps you want to stand by your words as a beacon for what you believe. I will follow whichever course you prefer.
10ChristianChristian’s final replyChristian disputes my interpretation and says he no longer wants further dialogue.Monday, July 15, 2024 9:01 AM
From: Christian
Sent: Monday, July 15, 2024 9:01 AM
To: Daniel Mazur <dan@compits.net>
Subject: Re: Seeking Change
Danny,
You stated yourself in one of your first communications that I approached you with kindness. I'm having a hard time seeing where the same has been returned. In most of your responses you have ignored my points of view and just went on the attack. I realize you are on a mission, as you basically state. One example: I stated that we will all answer to Jesus someday for our actions, including your Father. You seem to have ignored that point entirely.
The Bible makes clear that pastors and teachers will have a stricter judgement and more to answer for than the rest of us. You are devoting your life to trying to bring this judgement now.
You talk a lot about his position on counseling and damage that you believe it has done to many. Did you ever look at the other side of it? The Bible states clearly in Psalm One not to take the counsel of the ungodly. Did you ever consider that he believed he was protecting people from being misled by worldly people? Is there a place for seeking counsel from a Christian counselor who won't attack a person's faith and is mature? In my opinion yes, and the Church has been in agreement with this for many years now. Maybe you are not as well informed as you think.
I fail to see where myself, or current Church leaders are required to answer for policies that were put in place by your Father. He will answer for them and the Lord will put much weight on what his motives were for these positions that were taken.
I will also state on this subject, that he stated MANY times from the pulpit that people should follow their doctor's advice and take their medications.
As I said in one of my notes, I believe that many of your positions are one sided and are not actually representative of all the facts. You claim to be seeking Truth, but I don't really think so. You are only interested in the bad, never the good.
In the meantime, the Church will continue to grow in wisdom and we will all try to learn from both the good things, and the mistakes of the past.
While I was interested in communicating with you, my thoughts were that these notes were between us. Since you plan to make them public, I'm no longer interested in any further dialogue. I cannot control what you do, and I expect you will slant things to suit your own purposes.
Christian
11Daniel MazurA point-by-point responseI address kindness, judgment, changing policies, and the continuing effects of past harm.Monday, July 15, 2024 11:46 AM
From: Daniel Mazur
Sent: Monday, July 15, 2024 11:46 AM
To: Christian
Subject: RE: Seeking Change
Christian,
It appears there may have been a misunderstanding regarding your expectations for direct responses. Let me address your comments point by point to ensure clarity and thoroughness.
Firstly, I acknowledged your kind approach, and I regret if you feel I haven't reciprocated that kindness. From my perspective, this is a subjective judgment that I believe is unfounded. I strive to be direct and honest, especially when discussing the significant damage I have endured, which is not hearsay, as you insist, but stems from my own personal experiences. The lack of empathy from you and others, in my matter and that of others, despite personal testimonies, only deepens the hurt. Moreover, your refusal to assist in bringing these matters to the appropriate authorities is, in my view, genuinely unkind. True kindness involves showing concern for those who have been harmed, a concern I have demonstrated for others, which seemingly you have overlooked.
Regarding your statement, "We all have to answer to Jesus someday," I have acknowledged our differing beliefs, as my atheism makes it clear that I do not share this conviction. However, I do believe in accountability during our lifetimes, as the scriptures suggest. The Bible speaks of justice and improving relationships, which, as I am sure you would agree, cannot be achieved by turning a blind eye and waiting for posthumous justice.
You mentioned, "You are devoting your life to trying to bring judgment now." Before making such a judgment, it would have been considerate to ask about my life's devotion. Such a statement can be perceived as unkind. My aim is for my life story to be meaningful and worthwhile. Addressing ongoing harm is only one aspect of my life. I am equally devoted to fostering love and care in my personal and professional relationships. Without asking, it is difficult for you to know this, but the truth is that my devotion lies in these positive endeavors, not in the narrow pursuit you’ve suggested.
"I fail to see where myself, or current Church leaders are required to answer for policies that were put in place by your father,” you stated. This point puzzles me. Why are you so determined to divert focus away from those being harmed? Why is it so crucial to you that people claiming harm are never heard? I wrote an entire book with substantial evidence of wrongdoings, yet you, like Bryan Rocine and others, seem determined to silence it. You are aware of my book, yet you refuse to read it. Have I not provided ample evidence of wrongdoings, not just by my father, in the portions you have read? Why do you assume there is nothing more—no additional facts or insights—in the unread 598 pages? The fact remains that the harmful dogma perpetuated by my father's teachings continues to inflict damage, and it is important to acknowledge this.
If policies are determined to be wrong or harmful, isn't it obvious that they need to be addressed and changed? If you found someone wounded in the street, would you not run to their aid and seek medical attention? Or would you ignore the bleeding friend or stranger, comforted by the belief that justice will only prevail after the death of the person who caused the injury? This kind of thinking is deeply flawed and fails to address the immediate suffering and the urgent need for intervention.
You claimed, “Many of your positions are one-sided and not representative of all the facts.” I care deeply about facts, and if you did as well, you wouldn’t make such claims without reading my work, which took 36 years to compile. You have shown no interest in taking the time or effort to even review, let alone understand, the facts. How can you determine that I am lacking in them? You haven't demonstrated that you're qualified to comment on the existence or non-existence of these facts. Your refusal to engage with the grievances of others suggests a preference for remaining complicit in your comfort zone. Is it unkind of me to state the obvious?
Your claim: "The Bible states clearly in Psalm One not to take the counsel of the ungodly." I may be wrong, but I think you’re implying that, as a non-Christian, my counsel shouldn’t be heeded. First, I'm not so sure I am "ungodly." Are you? Regardless, I understand such a perception is to be expected. This is precisely why I refer you to the scriptures, which clearly demonstrate the wrongs that have been, and continue to be, committed. Consider me a donkey, like the one in Numbers 22 who spoke to Balaam. Pay attention to the message. I believe your faith teaches that God's words can come from the most unusual and unexpected places, and they are meant to be noticed and heeded.
You said, "I will also state on this subject that he stated MANY times from the pulpit that people should follow their doctor's advice and take their medications." I don’t doubt he has said this at times. However, I have personally witnessed him advocating the opposite for many years, and I have numerous testimonies from others saying the same. If the current teaching is that members should consult with doctors, that is indeed a positive change.
However, if you are suggesting that because this is now the case, anyone who was previously treated differently should neither have been nor be consoled for the harm such ill-advised counsel caused, here we differ. When I was institutionalized, the doctors urgently requested a meeting with my father and me, but he refused. Conversely, when I was an outpatient, he had a church member try to act as my therapist. When I informed the therapist, Dr. Mastrelio, that I would only continue sessions if my father paid half the fee, my father's refusal to do so revealed the true nature of his interest in my seeing this specific therapist—one under his control.
Had you read my book, you would already know this. It’s not a "woe is me" story but an anecdote to illustrate my point. The harm caused by such ill advice should not be dismissed simply because the stance has now changed.
You also said, “I expect you will slant things to suit your own purposes.” Why would I engage in the very behavior I have fought against? I strive to be different from those who manipulate the truth. I have meticulously documented and presented evidence of such manipulation being done to me and to others, which I vehemently oppose. I have invited you to join me in this fight for truth. Our dialogue, the text exchanged between us, will be presented truthfully and accurately, exactly as it has been shared.
Lastly, déjà vu. Once again, you have said much but have not answered my sole question: Do you wish me to conceal your name? Please don't take this harshly; to me, it's simply an interesting observation. I cannot help but notice such things.
I hope I have addressed your questions adequately. If you need further clarification, please let me know. As for me, I have no further questions for you, except for the one regarding your name.
12Daniel MazurA final appeal for evidence and integrityI return to the questions of honesty, evidence, and the meaning of COR Values.Tuesday, July 16, 2024 8:23 AM
From: Daniel Mazur
Sent: Tuesday, July 16, 2024 8:23 AM
To: Christian
Subject: RE: Seeking Change
Christian,
Your assertion, "I expect you will slant things to suit your own purposes," is profoundly troubling. On what grounds are you questioning my integrity? I have provided you with concrete evidence illustrating how others have manipulated facts to serve their own interests—more accurately, lied about me—yet you have dismissed this information as mere hearsay. Can you name a single instance where I have acted dishonestly? What is the basis of your attack on my character?
As I have repeatedly emphasized, I am fighting against precisely this kind of behavior—dishonesty and the manipulation of facts to serve personal interests. This very issue is central to my book, "COR Values." In the opening pages, the title is explained: "COR Values describes a phenomenon where individuals choose 'comfort over reality,' leading to the creation of self-serving, distorted truths. The term 'COR' encapsulates the tendency of people to shape narratives and beliefs that align more with their personal desires than with objective reality."
Christian, your accusation mirrors the very injustices I have faced and that I address in my work. It exemplifies the harm caused by dishonesty and the distortion of facts—a harm that has impacted me and many others deeply. I implore you to consider the gravity of your words and the consequences of unfounded accusations.
You dismiss my concerns as hearsay. Hearsay? I provided you with the exact text messages between Bryan and myself, which I believe clearly demonstrate Bryan’s insincere responses and troubling lack of concern for the issues I raised. I asked you to present these messages to the board members. This is not hearsay; these are the documented exchanges between Bryan and me, plainly and transparently.
Are you accusing me of manipulating these texts? If you doubt their authenticity, you could easily verify the messages through forensic analysis. Must we really go to such lengths? You accuse me of being one-sided and uninterested in the facts, claiming I only focus on the negative. Is this not precisely what you are doing to me?
You claim to lack the facts, yet haven’t I provided you with many? My family and the church congregation have been instructed to avoid me; do you dismiss this directive as hearsay? You have an audio recording from me where the Church Pastor explicitly stated that associating with me would risk one’s eternal salvation. What more do you require? A professional voice analysis to prove it was your pastor speaking these words?
Again, I ask you: What have I done to make you believe I am dishonest? I ask this with great urgency because this is the very narrative I am fighting against—the lies and manipulations that have persisted for decades, including false stories about my character and integrity, which have snowballed to what I experience with you today.
I may have my faults, but as I’ve already expressed to you, my devotion is to a life of meaning and value, which inherently requires integrity and honesty. This commitment is not just personal; it is the core message of my work, "COR Values." I challenge you to reflect on the facts presented and engage in a genuine dialogue, free from the distortions and prejudices that have plagued this issue.
What more must I do to demonstrate my commitment to truth and integrity? Let us address this matter with the seriousness it deserves, seeking clarity and understanding rather than perpetuating unfounded accusations.
Continue the inquiry